This anti-perfectionist parenting rule is 'good for your kids to see,' says child psychiatrist—here's why

February 25, 2026 - 08:38

Child psychiatrist Suzan Song advocates for a powerful, liberating principle for parents: actively demonstrating imperfection. In a culture often saturated with curated ideals of family life, Dr. Song emphasizes that "there really is no perfect parent." The crucial step, however, is allowing children to witness a parent's genuine humanity.

This anti-perfectionist approach involves openly acknowledging one's own mistakes and navigating minor frustrations in real-time. A parent might verbalize a moment of oversight by saying, "Oh, I forgot to add an ingredient to the recipe. That's okay, we can adapt." This models resilience, problem-solving, and self-compassion without the burden of an unattainable standard.

Experts agree this transparency is profoundly beneficial for child development. Children learn that errors are a natural, non-catastrophic part of life. It reduces performance anxiety and fosters a healthier mindset where effort and learning are valued over flawless results. Furthermore, it strengthens the parent-child bond through authenticity, showing children they are loved within a real, imperfect relationship rather than a performative one. Ultimately, this rule shifts the focus from achieving perfection to building connection and resilience, skills that serve children far beyond their formative years.